Ms. Cheevious in Hollywood

My Zany Years Spent Working in Tinsel Town

MsCheevious

You’d like oxygen with that?

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YOU’D LIKE OXYGEN WITH THAT?

 

#DailyMischief

 

The other day I heard an engine failed on a Spirit Airlines flight recently. People reported that it looked as though the engine blew up. They could see the flames, and the cabin filled with smoke. This conjured up what is probably not-all-that-skewed of a vision of life inside the cabin that day.

If you aren’t familiar, Spirit Airlines is the airline that sucks people in with super cheap airfares. They do it by charging extra for basic needs while flying. If you want to go to Cartegena from Florida, you can get a flight sometimes for $9.00. Hard to believe you can travel to another country without clothes on, but that’s how you’ll get there for nine bucks (they call it the “Bare Bones” flight). If you want to bring your passport on board, it’s an additional $656.00, one way. Otherwise they’ll hold it at the gate for you and if you ever do make it back, they’ll make a quick call to Julio, and let him know he has to return it.

I flew Spirit to Houston for a mini family reunion a while back and was amazed at the fees for basic needs. You want to carry on your laptop? That’ll cost you twenty-five bucks (checked bags are twenty). You’re thirsty and in need of some water? Sorry. Nothing’s free. And, don’t try to buy water by flashing a smile or your good looks, because flirtation with the flight attendant costs you five. And if he’s gay? Ten.

I thought about how extreme this is, and the fact that Spirit is capitalizing on a public who is hurting financially and willing to go for the deal – at almost any cost. It still amazes me. It’s true, some of their fares just can’t be beat, and if you come prepared – you know, with your camelback (hidden under your jacket) full of water or, in my case, Grey Goose, as well as a sack lunch somehow smushed into your handbag (one of the only free carry-ons allowed) – then you’re golden. But good for them. They make money, and we get to go places and see things.

But back to my vision of the cabin filling with smoke. You people over at SPIRIT may want to pay attention here, because I’m about to unveil a bonafide business opportunity:

The next time there is an engine failure, smoke in the cabin, flames eating up part of the plane, or anything like that… when people start flailing around looking for help, or maybe some oxygen… Just make this announcement:

“We’re happy to assist you during this crisis here at Spirit Airlines. We offer oxygen masks for an additional fifty dollars. If you’d like to purchase one, hit your call button.”

 

 

Please visit my BREAST CANCER AWARENESS SHOP and show your support. Let’s show we care!

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Register to receive these posts by email and get my eBook “Ahhhhh…Haaaaaa Moments with Ms. Cheevious” for FREE as a result. Registration is on the right side bar of every blog post, or on our Facebook page. See you next time.

Blog content copyright 2013, LISA JEY DAVIS a.k.a. Ms. Cheevious.

 

A wing and a prayer

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A WING & A PRAYER

 

#DailyMischief

On Saturday M.C. Nugget and I drove down to San Diego for the weekend to stay with some of our great friends Gecko & Tee. We met them at their golf club the Grand Del Mar on the drive down, so Nuggie and Tee could golf while I laid leisurely by the pool with Gecko and our other bestie Minnie (she’s a skinny minnie).

I am definitely built for the leisure life. Especially when the weather cooperates. Gecko, Minnie and I had a remarkable time lounging in the warmth of the sun, sipping Chardonnay and flipping through fashion magazines. I almost felt like I envision life must be for one of the Kardashians (minus the rappers and the cops). It was GRAND.

The next day during our marathon NFL time, Tee showed me these photos of two hawks and a crow he’d actually taken with his phone on the course. He said one hawk had a crow in his talons, and another hawk flew up to him just as he was about to eat the crow, and started to move in on his meal.

IMG_8350

Tee said the two hawk’s got into a big fight, and in doing so….

Not eating Crow

lost the crow, who flew off as fast as his wings would carry him.

I am always in awe of people who capture these things as they happen. I’m the one in a scenario who’s always out some place witnessing something unbelievable… but by the time I think to snap the photo, I am fumbling around in my purse, throwing out my cosmetics bag, sunglasses, wallet… to get to my camera. Usually when the place is closing and the janitor is mopping up to go home.

I thought about that crow, and that I needed to talk about him in the blog.

Nuggie gave me the quippy title “Wing and a prayer” and I imagined the poor, lucky sap hyperventilating out something like, “Holy shit, I got out on a wing and a prayer,” and here Tee trumped me as well. He said:

“That crow was at the bar that night saying “Yeah, I kicked a hawk’s ASS today. You should’ve seen it.”

I could have called this post “A crow walks into a bar…” with that line. It was pure perfection.

PEOPLE. I have GOT to get some Ginkgo Biloba or something so I don’t have to steal shit from my friends for the blog. Isn’t Gingko Biloba that brain food that makes your synapses fire quicker? Yep. It’s on the list.

 

Please visit my BREAST CANCER AWARENESS SHOP and show your support. The response has been MILK TOAST people. MILK TOAST. And I know this is not like you or any of us. So, let’s show we care!

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Register to receive these posts by email and get my eBook “Ahhhhh…Haaaaaa Moments with Ms. Cheevious” for FREE as a result. Registration is on the right side bar of every blog post, or on our Facebook page. See you next time.

Blog content copyright 2013, LISA JEY DAVIS a.k.a. Ms. Cheevious.

 

 

I’m an excellent driver (in this)

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I’M AN EXCElLENT DRIVER (IN THIS)

 

#DailyMischief

 

I’m actually an excellent driver all the time. And Rain Man, Dustin Hoffman and his infamous character role aside…  I am even more of an excellent driver with my brand new Breast Cancer Awareness Scarf. Doesn’t it totally look like a driving scarf?  If I had goggles to pose with, I would have strapped those babies on so fast!

I LOVE this scarf, you guys!  The fabric is really nice jersey and it’s a gorgeous color! They call it heather gray I think, but it sort of looks blueish green, don’t you think?

Anyway, I’m PSYCHED, and if you’d like to be psyched as well AND make an impact for Breast Cancer you can get your own scarf (in any one of nine different colors) for only $22.95 here. If the scarf isn’t your deal, then get the luggage tag.  I talked about those already too, but I have pics in my boutique. You should check them out here.

BCA Scarf

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Register to receive these posts by email and get my eBook “Ahhhhh…Haaaaaa Moments with Ms. Cheevious” for FREE. Registration is on the right side bar of every blog post. See you next time.

Blog content copyright 2013, LISA JEY DAVIS a.k.a. Ms. Cheevious.