Ms. Cheevious in Hollywood

My Zany Years Spent Working in Tinsel Town

Entertainment

I’m in Miami Bitch!

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Before you get your panties in a bunch, just know I am quoting a very famous song by a VERY famous artist. You know the one “LMFAO”? Hasn’t everyone heard of him/her/them? Ha ha.

Well, chances are by the time you read this, I WILL be in Miami! Bee-otches! 🙂

M.C. Nugget bought the airline tickets the MOMENT his glorious Saints won the NFC Championship game.  We don’t have Superbowl tickets, but we’ll be in the MIX baby!  YAY!

So, today is Friday, and I am in a huge frenzy, of course to get everything done. And, being the consummate multi-tasker that I am, I’m not only writing my blog, but guess what? I’m training my new intern Chanda. Everyone say “hi” to Chanda – who is sitting here watching me type. lol

Chanda is also a blogger, and has recently made the transition from her old blogging format to a blog where she can post ads and things. I’m showing her how to do that. Pay her a visit at http://www.thyroidchronicles.net– and see what she’s got to say about getting and staying healthy if you have a thyroid condition.  Yesterday’s post was about not using microwaves.  I know.  Fat chance here, but hey – if it will get you healthy, I’ll bring my Bunsen burner.

So anyhow, you can imagine what sort of frenzy I’m actually in, heading to Miami – the land of beautiful, tan bodies, and no fat. Hey – I’m all about that – but what to wear?  I can’t just meander around Miami in Nuggie’s giant Saints Jersey all day.  So I thought – ‘hey… maybe I can find a Saints bikini!’  ha ha.  So, I perused this site that I always go to – and low and behold they had 10% off on all Roxy Swimwear.  In case you are new (welcome, if so!), I wear Roxy bikinis and board shorts.  Here’s a pic from me in Sayulita Mexico:

So without further adieu, here is the link to get your very own Roxy Bikini and whatnot (and trust me… I get a little somethin’ somethin’, but it won’t cost you any more than if you went there yourself)!

Insert shameless plug here: Get 10% off all Roxy swimwear and clothes at IslandSurf.com. Code: Save 2009

As far as what we’ll be actually doing in Miami?  Well, attending any party that will have us, of course, and causing all kinds of trouble! What else?

Stay tuned to hear all about it next week! 

Okay – so back to my list of one thousand things to do now!  Item number 3: Train Chanda the intern on inserting links into her blog.  Check!  Only 997 more to go!

That’s all I got for you people!  If you happen to see me running around in Miami in a Saints bikini, well – say hi, would you! ha ha! GO SAINTS!

Have a fabulous Superbowl weekend everyone!

Love you people!  Mmmmmmmphhhuuhhh!!!

xoxo,

Ms. Cheevious

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Blog content copyright 2009, LISA JEY DAVIS a.k.a. Ms. Cheevious

Magical Mystical Riverdance

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So, I recently attended a performance of “Riverdance – the Farewell Tour” Opening Night Gala at the Pantages Theatre in Hollywood. 

I have to say, had I based my decision to attend on the television commercials from way back in the 90’s, when Riverdance became all the rage, I may never have set foot out of my house that night!  Those commercials gave me absolutely no reason to pick up the phone or drive to the box office to buy a ticket. So, for years I relegated Riverdance to the dark recesses of my mind, right there next to all six of the Saw movies, and the broadway play Taller Than a Dwarf.

But when I received an invitation for my clients to attend the opening night gala of  “Riverdance – The Farewell Tour”  at the Pantages Theatre in Hollywood – well, let’s just say, five of my clients and their guests said “YES” and I was able to tag along. 

It was a great opportunity for my clients, and proved to be an incredible treat as well. Below is a strip of red carpet photos from that night… but you know the drill… I don’t divulge identities of my peeps!  So, you’ll just have to use your imagination!

Jey Associates Clients & Many Others Appear on Red Carpet for "Riverdance" Opening Night Gala at the Pantages Theatre in Hollywood
"Riverdance" Opening Night Gala Red Carpet - Pantages - Hollywood

As far as the show itself — can I just say “WOW“?   It was PHENOMINAL, magical, mysterious, ethereal… well – you get the point.  I had no idea!  I feel so fortunate to be able to say I’ve seen this incredible show!

It’s difficult to describe, but wikipedia puts it like this: “Riverdance is a theatrical show consisting of traditional Irish step dancing, notable for its rapid leg movements while body and arms are kept largely stationary.” 

Okay – so, I know what you’re thinking:  It’s a bunch of folk dancing demonstrations, like Mexican Hat Dancing or whatever… the kind that use to show up for “international day” in elementary school.  But I assure you – this is FAR FROM THAT!  It’s replete with music that ranges from jazzy and eclectic sort of celtic fusion to whimsical and contemporary music that accompanies the talented “step” dancers, as well as a few guests.  The guests range from street tap dancers (think Gregory Hines in “White Nights” or “Tap,”) to members of the Moscow Russian Dance Troupe.  And that doesn’t even begin to describe the incredible vocal ensemble, and ethereal choral combinations that these people were capable of!  Needless to say, the entire show – and it’s extremely talented cast – was outstanding. I would highly recommend this to anyone who enjoys live performance, music, theatre or dance.  It’s got all of the above.

Here are just a few images from the performance.  You may want to check your local theatre listings and try to catch Riverdance, before it goes away for good!  It’s time and money very well spent.

So there you have it people!  I’m in blustery, wintery Massachusetts as I type this.  M.C.’s parents are celebrating FIFTY glorious years together.  Whew! You don’t see that every day… it’s AWESOME!

Tune in next week people, when you’ll get some backstage dish (vicarious, of course) on the Golden Globes, Sundance and more.  That is, if I can get my friends to TALK. HA!

Love you people! Mmmmmmphhhuuuuhhh!!!

xoxo,

Ms. Cheevious

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Blog content copyright 2009, LISA JEY DAVIS a.k.a. Ms. Cheevious 

Post-Post-Posting On Heaven’s Wall

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Yesterday I was doing some work on my laptop at the kitchen counter in my mom’s house in Albuquerque, New Mexico.  As I sat typing away, she lay in her hospital bed, waiting for her body to finally let go of life, and allow her to rest.

Since my mom’s stroke, I’d been thinking a lot about my dad…  how I wished I could just talk to him.  I didn’t really have very much time with my dad.  He died when I was 23 — barely an adult, really.  So, I never felt like I really KNEW him… or that we really bonded.  And now, with mom on her death bed, I definitely realize how much I am going to miss her — something I was not so keenly aware of with my dad.  Sure I loved him and hated to see him go. Sure, I think of him, but they are just images mostly. I don’t have that almost tactile feeling of sadness when I think of my dad, or even the loving fondness that comes from having depth in a relationship. 

So as I sat there, worried about my mom, and how I would miss her deeply,  it was only natural for me to feel that I should somehow miss my dad to the same degree…  it was only fair.  And yesterday, as I sat there thinking about all of this, I just knew that talking to my dad again would solve that.  We would bond, talk about what he’s been up to since I was 23, and when our talk was over, I would truly miss my dad just as much as I knew I was going to miss my mom.  Sound strange?  It does to me!  HA!  But alas, I never promised SANITY in here people – entertainment, mixed with a little spice here and there, maybe, but sanity, never! CRAZINESS is more the order of the day here!

Then I signed onto Facebook.  I had many people to communicate with — all my wonderful well-wishers, and such. As I perused my home page, I was struck by something I found very odd.  People were jumping into their friend’s wall posts and status updates to communicate something completely unrelated.  One friend posted something about the pies she was baking, and someone commented on it, “Hey!  When are we going for that bike ride?” and so on.  It was remarkable to me the number of people who were just plain LAZY on Facebook.  Of all people, I realized how much time it could take to go to each person’s page and post on their wall, or to manually send them messages… especially if there were a good number of people to connect with, as in my case.  But I decided right then and there I was not going to “piggy back” on other people’s posts to get my thank you’s or comments over to my friends.  They’d been way too supportive during all this stress and sadness over my mom.  I just couldn’t handle sending a blanket thank you on my wall.  They deserved individual responses.  So I spent the next several hours doing just that.

Later on… away from my computer… as I was about to walk into my mom’s hospital room, my cell phone rang.  It was a blocked call, but since I was in Albuquerque I took the call. 

“Lisa J. Davis?” the sweet voice said.

“Yes?” I replied.

“This is Heaven calling, and I’ve got your dad on the line. He’d like to talk to you.”

“What?  Is this some kind of joke?” I said, as I started toward my mom’s door.

“No ma’am,” she said joyfully, “We’ve seen your wall posts on Facebook, and we think it’s a good thing that you did today.  We decided to answer your prayer about talking to your dad.  We think it’s something that will do some good, and we wanted to reward you for doing the right thing on Facebook.”

“Really?” I exclaimed, “That’s fantastic!” I walked into my mom’s room and said, “Mom!  I’ve got DAD on the line!  He wants to talk to us!”

And then I woke up.  Yup.  I even DREAM in Facebook.  Oh, but what a fantastic dream.

But there are a few lessons to the story, I suppose: 

1) Watch what you post on Facebook. If you play your cards right, you may get an answer to prayer! Ha ha!

2) Facebook has some MAJORLY AWESOME PROGRAMMERS working for them, dude!  They’ve got a direct connection to HEAVEN!

3) Your prayers can be answered over the phone, via AT&T!

4) I probably spend WAYYY too much time on Facebook, thus the DREAM about it!

Have a dreamy weekend my beautiful, NON-LAZY Facebooking friends!

Love you people! Mmmmmmphhhuuuuhhh!!!

xoxo,

Ms. Cheevious

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Blog content copyright 2009, LISA JEY DAVIS a.k.a. Ms. Cheevious 

I Am On FIRE!

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So, the date was December 19, 2009. M.C. and I hosted a little holiday party at my place. It was awesome. People came and went. A couple of my clients stopped by, as well as some family… It was the usual holiday get-together.  That is, until about 2:00 am.

That’s when all that remained were me, M.C. and a couple of our friends who decided to stick around and gab. At one point we decided to start taking photos to remember the evening.

I was the first designated photographer (and last – you’ll see why in a second). I moved in to get a great shot, and leaned over to get an even  “better” angle of the three of them.  I didn’t realize I was dangerously close to a taper candle M.C. lit earlier that evening.

My girlfriend gasped and said, “Lisa! Your hair’s, on fire!” I shrugged it off and patted it out… or so I thought, until she continued, “No! It’s REALLY on fire!”

Just then M.C. took two very large strides in my direction and somehow patted the flames out — VERY quickly.  (Actually all of that happened in a matter of seconds).

That was it for the photo session!  I ran to my bathroom to observe the damage, and believe it or not, there was NO VISIBLE DAMAGE?  I am NOT kidding!  That’s what I get for accommodating my friends and being the designated photog!  Ha!

The only thing I can think of which may have prevented my hair from going “POOF!” and literally bursting into flames, however, is that I’d been using a new hair product for a while (that day and evening included). It was a heat protector to be used prior to flat-ironing your hair.  I’d been in search of something like it for years, and when I found it a few months back, I immediately began to use it.  It protects your hair up to 475 degrees, Fahrenheit.  So – I am thinking it had to have some sort of FLAME RETARDANT in the mix!  Ha ha!  Is that CRAZY or WHAT? 

So, here is a picture of me with some super imposed flames on my hair.  I never got any pictures of myself that evening… as I mentioned!  By the time we got around to taking photos, my hair burst into flames!  HA HA! 

I’m told this is how big the flame was (or at least this is how I imagined it based on the saucer-sized eye balls my girlfriend had)!!

What’s funny is that about a week later, my girlfriend called me up to tell me that I must have angels around me, because my whole head of hair was engulfed in flames, and there was NO damage.  We were laughing about it.  I told her about my little product, which, of course, she asked me to pick up for her the next time I saw it. 

Fast forward to this past Wednesday.  She was back at my house, prior to an event I was taking her to (she is also a client of mine).  It was the People’s Choice Awards Post Celebration Party Benefiting Britticares (for kids with cancer).  Long story short, I was still finishing up my “flat-iron” routine when she arrived, so she chatted with me while I finished up.  My “product” was sitting on the counter, and I held it up to her.  And I swear, it was the FIRST time I’d actually paid any attention to the name, but it was called “GUARDIAN ANGEL.”  I kid you NOT.  Pretty funny!  We CRACKED UP at the fact that not only did I have angels around me, but I also had a GUARDIAN ANGEL – in a BOTTLE!  Ha! 

And – of course, without further adieu – here it is, my friends. My “Guardian Angel”:

Be sure to click this link and buy it now (shameless plug, I know).

So – we laughed and went off to enjoy a fabulous night at the People’s Choice Awards Post Celebration.  It was a fantastic event, and my girl and another celebrity friend were photographed, interviewed, hit up for autographs – the whole shebang (sp?). 

Whew!  I’m SOOO glad I can take that one off the list! I now know what it’s like to be ON FIRE.

Have a fantastic weekend you marvelously gorgeous humans! 

Love you people!  Mmmmmmppphhuuuhhhhhh!!

xoxo,

Ms. Cheevious

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Blog content copyright 2009, LISA JEY DAVIS a.k.a. Ms. Cheevious 

Long Live the Rabbit

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Welcome to Ms. Cheevious-land, where some posts are more “Ms. Cheevious” than others…  Some can even be downright offensive…  This could be one of those.

Particularly if you are a member of my family.  But know this: you have been warned.  And I’m NOT kidding.

And to you females out there, just remember: don’t knock it til you’ve tried it.

So here goes!

List of electronic devices that give pleasure:

1)      The Television

2)      The iPod

3)      The Computer (for some)

4)      The Massage Chair, and

5)      The Rabbit (if you do not know what a Rabbit is, now is the time to stop reading).

Four out of five of these devices utilize quality control personnel in the development process. That is, people who test the device before it goes to market, to be sure it is

a) truly meeting the customer’s need,

b) functioning properly,

c) achieving the customer’s desired goal(s), and

d) is durable and built to last for a reasonable amount of time.

I have to say I am reasonably satisfied with the first four electronic devices on the list. But what, might I ask, happened to number 5?

For GODSAKES PEOPLE, don’t the makers of these devices know that if they actually made Rabbits according to the criteria above, their sales would skyrocket, PMS would become the stuff of legends, and the term “bitch” would actually be used to refer only to female dogs.  And besides, we all know that when women are happy, the whole world rejoices.

Just think about.  A Rabbit should

a) help women see the face of god quicker, reach nirvana, or fill in the blank;

b) do what it is suppose to do based on the features on the box;

c) provide that “pleasure” (see “devices that give pleasure” list above) in the absence of a man, in the presence of a boring man, or during football season (hey I’m not only thinking of myself here); and

d) be durable… REALLY DURABLE… and last for a reasonable amount of time.

What is a “reasonable amount of time”, you might ask?  Twenty minutes about four times a week for at least three years.  I think that’s fair.

But no.  Apparently there are no test marketers for vibrators, at least from what I can tell.  And so, with great personal sacrifice, I am now dedicating my life to ensuring that quality, durability, and product satisfaction go hand-in-hand with the mighty Rabbit… and when they build the monument to me, let them say “She did it not for herself, nor for the battery companies, but for her sisters around the world and the men they stopped annoying.”

Yes, I will spend the rest of my days testing these devices, and ensuring world peace.

As you hum my theme song, please feel free to provide your list of demands, and I will take them into consideration while conducting my research. 

Long Live the Rabbit!

Love you people!  Mmmmmphhhuuuhhhhh!!!

xoxo,

Ms. Cheevious

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Blog content copyright 2009, LISA JEY DAVIS a.k.a. Ms. Cheevious 

Left Boob, Right Hand

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I slept really well last night. When my blackberry alarm went off at 7:45 am, which is later than I should have risen, I grabbed it, hit snooze and somehow, miraculously fell back into a deep sleep.

When I woke up – oh, a cool 15 minutes later, I was laying peacefully on my back. The first thing I noticed, however, was that my right hand had a pretty good hold of my left boob. And my arm wasn’t sore from clenching, no. It was sort of a peaceful, restful hold. I chuckled out loud.

First of all, I must address the chuckle. That my friends, is pretty good, because contrary to my normal inclinations, I’ve been waking up lately with worry and to-do lists on the brain, so the laughter was a welcome guest this morning. And people, I know this is an aside to that, but I want you to know that I ALREADY KNOW I shouldn’t be worrying, and have some serious meditation to do to get off my arse and start creating an incredible future. I knew some of you wouldn’t let that “worry” thing pass you by.

So, back to my story.

Talk about Girls Gone Wild!  And I wasn’t even TRYING!  Tell me people, what could it MEAN? Why is it that a girl wakes up peacefully holding her breast?  I could NOT for the life of me get a “hold” of my breast while awake, without clenching or “grabbing.”  Believe me! I tried to recreate it!

I know, I’m an odd one.

But apart from the dream I had last night, where I was dating a wild and crazy rock star (which – okay – I sort of AM), and the fact that a dream like that could elicit all manner of mayhem in my bed.  Apart from that, why my boob? And why so peaceful? And why coffin-style?

Tell me, oh great dream interpreters, please! And does the meaning change if it was reversed? Right boob, left hand?

Am I reading too much into this? heh heh

I gotta say, this Halloween weekend is getting off to a jolly old wild and crazy little start.

I’m going to be an officer of the law, and I’ll be on patrol on Main Street in Santa Monica with my funny, sexy, handsome man M.C. Nugget (@EmceeNug on Twitter). He’s dressing as Fred the Wonder Chicken (remember him?) – dressed as a pirate.  I wanted him to be my jailbird, but M.C. says he’ll be a criminal from a different era. I’ll be walking around saying things like “I’m gonna’ have to confiscate that yummy drink you just got” and stuff like that.

Here’s my costume – and YES – I am bringing my full-length coat so I don’t freeze.

HalloweenPoliceOfficer

And here is the picture from last year, with FWC and I dressed as Pirates.  This will be Nuggie this year:

HalloweenNIGHTFWC

Stay tuned next week when I tell-all. Oh – and I’ll fill you in on the red carpet event I took my peeps to earlier this week!

Have a safe, fun, scary, ghostly time this weekend you gorgeous men and women!

Love you people! Mmmmmmmmphhhhuuuhhhhhhhh!

xoxo,

Ms. Cheevious

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Blog content copyright 2009, LISA JEY DAVIS a.k.a. Ms. Cheevious